This past weekend I celebrated my parents’ 35th Wedding Anniversary.

My siblings and I planned a surprise vow renewal ceremony and reception.

It was replete with wedding clothes, a makeup artist, photographer, cake, decor etcetera and etcetera.

It was busy, hectic but mostly beautiful.

And I like to process things. 

I like to sit down with a thought and break it down and analyze it and feel it and re-experience it.

So I’ve been in processing mode. 

What did I glean from this weekend? 

And I think it’s this. 

I saw what the true beauty of marriage is.

It’s not the happiness of the husband or the happiness of the wife.

It’s the reflective nature of that beauty.

It’s the reverberation of a couple’s sound.

It’s the echoes in me and my siblings’ romantic choices, the impact on friends and family and community. 

It’s the constant choice.

To have and to hold. To honor and to uphold.

It’s the beauty of humility and selflessness.

Of submission and respect.

It’s feet washing. The most beautiful part of their renewal ceremony.

It’s commitment to serving the other. 

It’s the full awareness of the cracks and faults and challenges, but the constant whisper of I still do.

So I stood there officiating my parents’ ceremony without rose tinting and Febreezing the stinky parts of marriage. 

But in awe of their choice to go at it some more.

Hands held tightly and squinting into the sun. 

They said, “I still do.”

And those words will forever be true beauty to me. 

 Happy Coral Anniversary,

Ambini